Seasoned Slut


So, was anyone else a slut in high school?  (ME! ME! ME!) I had a close girlfriend who not only condoned, but accompanied me on most of these lustful excursions, so, I guess it never occurred to me. Of course, we were sluts. Lol. It’s very very obvious to me now. Hey, when you’re a beautiful blonde 16 year old with big tits and a dark tan… Well, that’s when I truly first began to notice my affliction for dicks. I mean, I wanted them all the time. Either in my mouth or hand or just in me. It began as constant thinking and playing with myself as a child and early adolescent to full-blow slut status.


Did it spook me? Okay. I admit it. It did somewhat trip me out to hear girls put down guys for one thing or another, when all I wanted to do was shove them all into my mouth. Every shape and every size. I couldn’t imagine anything more perfect than man meat as part of a healthy balanced breakfast, lunch or dinner. Damn! I was such a dirty lil slut. Oh, it’s okay. I’m not offended by the title at all. It is what it is. And I am most certainly what I am.


Was I different? Maybe not a whole hell of a lot different than the other chicks my age, except for my daily incessant need for male flesh. And I didn’t see THAT as any type of disease. Not when I enjoyed it so damn much. It was just day upon day of fantasies and then nights of the actual physical counterparts. There’s nothing like a deliciously juicy cock to disguise the fact that you’re more different than the girlfriends I spent so much time with. But seeing as it was always in the back of mind (and had always been there), it never seemed out of place or additional to my other needs at all.


And. just like that first rip of paper on Christmas morning, it just never seemed a stale or out of style idea to drop my pants to an 18 year old’s wandering hands when I was 14 at the Fair. Nope. Just second nature. Did I show more sexual attention to any one kind of man? No, not really. Back then, all were welcome to ride this train. And did, with an ever-increasing urgency through those high school years.


I recall, in particular, one such occasion. My best gal pal and I ran into two of the most gorgeous guys in town. Usually, they were both hooked up, but tonight… we didn’t care. Well, my girlfriend ended up getting sick. If you’re truly getting to know me, then you already know what happens next… Of course, I took one for the team (I know. I know. No, your welcome) on the tail-bed of a big red Chevy truck. They tag-teamed the shit out me! And, afterwards, I didn’t feel guilty or dirty in any way. Far from it. I felt energized and suspiciously light-headed, as if intoxicated. This became known as my dick fog. Lol.


I even had a short stint as a guest d.j. at our local hard rock radio station that would never after occurred if I’d never sucked the cock of the late night d.j. He must have enjoyed it, because my voice appeared over the air for two whole months of my 17th year of life. I even tried to stretch it out by doing the morning d.j., but he had definitely had far less sex appeal, and I ended up chickening out. Once the kids at school heard me through the speakers of their car stereo, my popularity was sealed for high school.
And, being a slut wasn’t what I just did for fun on a Saturday night, darlin. It became part of who I was. And I have never regretted it. Sure it’s gotten me in a ton of trouble over the years. Mostly with the women closest to the men I did so enjoy frequently fuckin. Regardless, I was happy with my situation in life then, and I don’t feel any guiltier about it today. It’s just who I am. I LOVE COCK! Decorate it with flowers, streamers and balloons, folks, but it’s still just the parade of an insatiable sexy slut. Won’t you celebrate with me?




Today’s subject kinda intimidates me.  I mean, I don’t want to exaggerate the details in any way.  It was most definitely memorable. To be perfectly honest, it’s been only hours, and my skin is still tingling.  Okay…  Here goes.

And, he was tall and sexy, and there was an intense brown tint covering his flesh, which I recognized immediately as the shadow of the late summer Florida sun.  And… ooooohhhh.  How to describe it? Thick and veiny and just the right length!  Oh, you know what I did! Definitely.  I was tonguing his cock before I ever even asked his name. He let me lick and suck him… EVERYWHERE!  And, let me tell you… He was absolutely delicious.  Like a peppermint candy slowly dissolving on the edge of my wet tongue.  I’ll never forget that sweet taste.


But, HOLY SHIT!  Well… at first, I just hopped right up on top, expecting to ride him slow and with intention.  That is so NOT what happened.  From rip, he took control, thrusting his hips high and his cock deeper and deeper within me.  With every thrust he slid over my g spot.


The puddles on the bed made it obvious.  We were chemically in tune to each other, that’s for sure!  I mean, not only could you FEEL it, you could actually sense it in the heavy hot air.  I don’t know where the fuck he came from, but I sure would like to know where he’s been!!


We fucked… and fucked.  Then we fucked.  Followed by a lil fuckin. Which of course we celebrated by fucking. We would have finished off with some fucking, but we were too busy fucking to care.  If I could only find the words to describe the feeling of him inside me…  Alas, words alone wouldn’t even be able to help you understand.  Just amazing.  And it fit… perfectly.  I was truly fucked.  I think I was just passionately fucked for the first time in a VERY long time, and I FUCKING loved it!!  I didn’t wanna it to stop.  I didn’t want that orgasmic sensation to ever EVER end!  I actually think I’m addicted.
So, my dilemma is this… do I send him a text after such a short time?? Something I just never ever do.  I mean, who has the time?  Half the time I struggle to answer the texts and emails I’ve already accumulated while I was writing, eating, sleeping, cleaning, hanging out with friends.  I’m at a loss for words on this?  I don’t even have a clue what I would say.  Argh!

“Friends” Forever

So let’s give a shout-out to my older gentlemen “friends”.  Some of them have some very INTERESTING ideas of a good time, but I’m always down for just about every damn thing… EXCEPT PAIN!  Of course.  Despite the fact that it’s a hard one to swallow (hee hee), I actually feed off of other’s pleasure.  I’ve always called it a “Pleasure Pleaser”.

I get it… It sounds a little rediculous but despite what you might think, there are other’s like me.  Unfortunately, mostly men that I’ve noticed.  (Or maybe I just know a lot more males than females.)  I love to feel a fella out, until I am able to sense his need.  Okay, come one.  Of course, I don’t claim perfection. Lol.

Maybe it’s a gift.  I’ve been given the ability to please myself by pleasing others.  Lol.  Yeah!  Perhaps it’s more like blessed or just fucking lucky!  Not many can claim as much.  And… well, you know me…  the naughtier the better!  Not that I have anything against a sensual sexual experience.  You know… lips pressed;  flesh to flesh;  gentle and smooth;  with an overly heightened explosion as the end result.  Yes, It’s all good  to me.  Lol.

Until we speak again…

Lotsa Lixx  

See Lixx for an Amazing Fixx

Well, the LANEY LIXX Showcase is back up.  Did anyone already figure that?  So, I haven’t talked about anything juicy for awhile.  Lemme tell ya about this hottie offshore fella from yesterday.  Very Hot!!!

He was sexy and round and in desperate need of a need-relieving friend.  (That’s me!)  I rubbed my body against him and licked one of his nipples.  I asked him a couple of questions.  Seems he totally enjoys reading my blog.  He tells me the squirting really turned him on.  So, I took a vibrator and gave him a sexy shower show!  

IT DID TURN HIM ON!  He watched me while stroking his cock lovingly.  Finally, he walked around to where I had laid my long thick hair over the edge of the bed and dropped himself directly into my mouth.  He was swollen, super hard and ready.  I took him onto my tongue and he exploded into my mouth.  A full load, I can attest to this.  Delicious!  I licked the last drop from him and smiled.  Naughty naughty, loud and haughty!

So, listen.  That was amazing.  Just using my toy to make myself cum and shower the entire bed with my orgasm.  I’m just super psyched about a new idea.  What do you think about me offering just a Super Sexy Shower Show for a special rate?  You think they’d wanna see that?  Hmmmm…  Well, I’m horny as hell so…  Looks like I’m going back to work people!

The MAN and the olive branch

Let’s catch ya’ll up.  Wow!  What a fucking week!  Where the fuck to begin?  (If the expletives offend you, this might not be YOUR day darlin.) Look, when a situation is able to zap the sex drive from my entire body… I’d consider that shit a catastrophe!  Life is fucked up enough!  I need my fuckin O’s!  But, I fucked up.  Hey, I’m fucked up and occasionally, i do fuck up. It most definitely happens.  But it’s never intentional or mean-hearted in any way.  I am not that bitch.  So, in shock, I came upon the chat where different people (who DO NOT FUCKIN KNOW ME) were discussing why I stood certain nakedguy up! You shitting me?  Just offering their own two cents on my life and the psychology behind my decision making process.  (Okay, perhaps not the exact words right there. Lol.)

The very first email in my inbox was from a moderator of our panhandle forums.  He thought me too sensitive (I get this), and stated that if I didn’t create a new showcase… I “must not be a world-class provider.” Ooh, them judgements are quick, arent they?! Is it just me or is this MAN a bunch of fuckin men? I’ve never felt so crushed. Now… give into the Bullshit and create a new profile.? Or move on, pride somewhat intact?

So… At this moment, I am folding clean clothes and jammin, and thinkin…  What would you do?  Seriously.  I need to be decided soon.  My rent is due in two days.  Gotta do something.


My very first memory was of swapping oral with my grandfather.  

(If you can take a moment to get past whatever disgust you now feel, perhaps we can talk about some REALITY for a moment.  I mean, it happened.  He’s passed.  I give you permission to use an open mind as I recall the birth, blossom, and bloom of MasterHead69.)

That memory, that first recollection of life, was also my first feeling of sexual stimulation.   You heard me right.  I KNOW my body was reacting, because I remember it most vividly.  I became hot.  And, although unsure, somehow I must have recognized that what I was doing to him was resulting in some wonderful sensations coursing throughout my abdomen.  I believe that my addiction for pleasure must have began that moment, and is likely why I remember it so vividly. 

There are so many distinct memories from my childhood of events, emotions, and sensations that even time has not erased.  Once, I was on the floor with my brother and cousins, and I can even now hear my grandmother’s voice loudly asking my mother, “well, why does she always hump the floor like that?”  Oh yes.  It was most obvious, even then, that I enjoyed touching myself.  

You know how this works.  Once stimulated, you can never quite go back to your innocent beginnings.  No, more often than not, there seems to be a steady progression through different sexual personalities.  And should you decide to feed that throbbing beast, it will continue to hunger for more and more of that which sates it.  Even out only momentarily.  So, of course, it wasn’t long before I’d attracted a few more family members who found me much more than they seemed able to resist. (Of course, that’s what I was told.)

Now, get it straight.  I had never actually had sex.  Oh, I often performed oral on them, but most often, they seemed tho prefer to lick and touch my hairless snatch.  Sometimes, even inserting a finger in my tender flesh.  I would always pretend to be asleep, for fear of the embarrassment if they knew I actually enjoyed their assaults. Of course they knew.  My body’s own reaction was unmistakable.  And surely it was noticed how i would yawn and move just a bit, allowing them just a bit more access. 

Even worse, was my addiction for playing with myself.  I discovered over the years that I really liked touching myself, and often I’d insert household items inside of me. I kept them so well hidden beneath my clothes that no one ever knew. But even more so, I absolutely LOVED watching MYSELF pleasuring MYSELF!  I learned to hold a reflective object as a mirror (confiscated from my mother’s designer plate collection), between the heals of my feet at just the right angle that I could actually observe my own curiosity driven pleasure-filled budding clitoris.  Most delicious to see was the way my pussy would begin to swell tightly closed and turn a delightful purple hue, after intense play and orgasming.

I was 14 when it finally ended.  Okay, certainly not all.  Just the kinfolk fondling.  I mean, I’d always been attracted to men.  I actually began writing my sex stories in middle school.  But for the first time, I finally had a less perverted experience with a guy.  He was a whole lot closer to my age (5 years older), and, although he wasn’t my first, he certainly was the object of my lust for awhile.  And, to be honest, I was actually happy to show him that I was experienced and able to please him.  Suddenly, my childhood just seemed an odd dream compared to these new experiences and the insane attraction I felt for this 19 year old drop-out.

Oh, I definitely didn’t stop there.  Over the years, i fed my perverse pleasure beast large amounts of the flesh it so desired. Male and female.   In turn, my experiences began to get wilder and wilder.  In my late teens and early twenties, my fiance’ and I were frequent bisexual swingers, and attended orgies at least once a month.  It was an absolutely fantasy-like time where the boundaries were blurred, and all senses were heightened.

And that has led me here… a place where I’ve surrounded myself by all types of stimulation; allowing myself to explore the depths of my intense hunger completely to the verge of my most perverted desires.  All in a day’s play…  

So, is it nurture or nature that influences the progression of one’s intense need for pleasure fulfillment, despite most consequences?  Maybe, I was just born this way.  It’s always felt completely natural to me.  Just a deeper side of my personality.  One free of judgement and guilt, with only one goal… the giving and 

 receiving of pleasure.  So, I say it again… and much more loudly…

“FREAKS ARE BORN. NOT MADE”, my friends.

I’m not sorry, just apologetic…

Let’s see… Guess I have some explaining to do.

This morning, I awoke like a hungover teenager-groggy and rundown. Really, if felt alot more like I’d been run over.  I bumped into the wall twice on my way to the bathroom. I return to find 14 unread text messages and countless emails blocking up my phone’s screen. 

First text, a soon to be new “friend” used 3 messages to inform me that overnight, in the midst of my slumber, I had received a bad review. Despite half a cup of coffee, I still could only vaguely recall the events of yesterday. I remember getting super hot in the Dollar Store. I have a foggy recollection of inhaling half a peanut butter sandwich when returning home, in hopes of feeling less ill. After that, I know I answered the phone twice, probably more. Actually, it suddenly occurs to me, one of those calls was probably the alarm I set sometime in the early afternoon, when I finally came to the realization that I was unable to keep my very own eyes open by my strength alone. 

When I first heard about the escort site, I was so excited. Finally. Something that got down to the truth of the business. A place to bring together it’s two major contributors.  “Friends” that were clean, and decent, and just looking for an honest good time, would finally have the ability to hear the truth about ladies, like myself, who were truly in it because they enjoyed it. What could be more perfect?

For years, I’ve competed with younger, thinner, more energetic females who would spend days on end first copying my ads (almost word for word), and then, quickly, flagging them. It was a constant battle against girls that were more in search of the quick cash, rather than an actual good time. At times, scorned men would take out their frustrations on me. On several occasions, ripping me off, thinking it was in some way alright because someone ‘like’ me did the same to them. An honest site could be nothing but good for an honest lover of men like me. Right?

Last year, I finally gave in and went to an emergency room in Alabama. 2 years of pain and chronic kidney infections, and I no longer had the strength to work, least of all… live. Our new “affordable healthcare” has definitely created more sick people than well, and I am a physical first-hand example of this fact. When I suffered kidney failure in 2013, Stupid Heart Hospital released me after 8 very bad days and, finally, one day where (at least) I finally wasn’t on my death bed,  with a script for 20 tabs and a referral to the County Health Clinic. Surely you can see why I chose an out-of-state hospital this time.

The first Alabama hospital found me to be severely dehydrated and in kidney failure. Three days later, they shipped me via amabulance to USA. Two weeks, and 2 major surgeries later, I was released with a buttload of staples in my gut and a diagnosis. Unfortunately, I cannot afford “affordable healthcare”, so I now live with a kidney stent in my urether that was due to be removed in February of this past year. As the months have passed, I have slowly found myself wth less and less energy. And, at times, just generally very tired.

I’m not looking for symphathy. I can only imagine how foolish I would feel if I was stood up in the way that yesterday’s “friend” was. I can only say that I’m sorry, and hope that he realizes it was unintentional. Unfortunately, out of the countless “friends” who’ve known me personally and are also on the site, only one was kind enough to write a review of me. So, out of the 2 reviews, 50% of them are bad. I’m not sure that will help me in anyway with future sexual encounters, and is the reason I wrote the pitiful (and I admit, rediculous) “I’m Sorry” post. 

So, the biggest of apologies to those of you who take the time out of your busy lives to experience a wee bit of mine… I’m sorry if I sounded like I wouldn’t write again. I find it more and more difficult to remain relative in the scene of hotties that are now the local escorting norm. Despite drug addictions, and a tendency to rush sexual encounters, they win again. If I was as good as my “friends” have lead me to believe, I now hold a 50% possible good time rating. 

I do have regular “friends”, and I could fill up buildings with pages of stories of past experiences that would leave many either laughing, shaking their heads, or stroking themselves absentmindedly. So, I won’t give up. Not as long as anyone still cares to ready about me and my insane life. And please forgive me for assuming I even could give up after such a silly situation. I may be as lustful as any man, but deep down… I’m still just a sensitive pussy.

Thanks for listening.


The dark secret of the sex trade is definitely that it is loneliest job a gal could ever choose for herself.  I hate this.  Almost my entire life I have been honed and nursed into this sexually starved individual that I now am.  Yet, I am utterly alone.  You can’t have a true partner.  They are usually married.  Or they don’t look at you as anything but an object.  You can’t tell the complete truth, because life turns men off. They come to us to escape it.   So, here i sit…

I think I quit.



Good morning, my kinky friends. Where have all of you been hiding?  I am usually face deep in other things, so it’s possibly my fault.  I’m kinda forgetful at that point.  But, hey, I CAN FEEL YA NOW! 

Friday. About 7 years ago I was posting on craigslist and wrote for the first time the title “Freaky Friday Fun!”  Or maybe it was Freaky Funday…   That one wasn’t really that popular actually.  By the time Craigslist had ghosted all of my accounts, I must have posted hundreds of differnt titles. You’d never believe the crazy shit that got me the most attention.  The top one had 300 emails in my inbox in the first 15 minutes.  Can you hear me??

So, as I’m short of time… Here are the top results.  




This one I posted more than probably any other.  It ran the entire 45 day limit the first time, so it always had a repost option.  It took seconds to repost and never counted againsts the 75 posts a CL ad could actually hold. After the 75 limit, if you don’t have any renew or repost options (It happened), the account just would no longer poster anythings else.  Just, blah.  (Yeah, I might have done the CL thing a little too long.)



Cum on.  Who’s really that suprised???  You all know it.  And as I put it… LESS MESS!!!  Not only was it a good title, it is my philosphy.  I’m just a lazy southern chick.  How could an easy no frills clean up be bad?  I worked for it, that kinda makes it mine, right? Good.  I’m thirsty.


I don’t know how to introduce this, so I’ll just sign out after it’s revealed.  Any guesses?  You’re probably a lot closer than you think… 



Perverse Pleasures

Okay. Let’s talk porn. You know, you can learn a lot about a person by asking them one simple question…

“When you go to watch porn, what are the first five words you type into the search box?”
See! I told ya. Did I throw you off balance just a little there? Now, be honest. I, myself, am a freak. And, as such, am attracted to those of my kind. Maybe my previous question doesn’t tell you so much about the actual person, but it’s definitely where I like to start. And, of course, just the honest answering of such a question says so much all by itself.

Over time, one’s boundaries get nudged, pushed, and slid further and further from what you WOULD NEVER DO, and closer and closer to what you JUST HAVE YET TO DO. Oh, I thoroughly enjoy indulging in my favorite and nastiest of carnal pleasures for a few hours every now and then. You know, not just your regular porn. More the type that, at first, may have repulsed you. …until you realized that just watching it left your genitals humming. I do so love a good buzz. Oh, as far as movies go, I much prefer amateur porn of the naughtiest variety. In fact, sleep and taboo clips really turn me on. And, at this point, those are all I will mention. Yes, my tastes (at times), could possibly be described by some as obscene, so I dare not mention them… yet. Perhaps. When we know each other better. 

So… what shall I watch today? Nothing too graphic. It’s been a few days, so I wanna get a real good one. But, it can’t be too good. That would be even worse. Once stimulated fully, my pussy becomes a deep purple hue and swells shut tight. At that point, I am absolutely not responsible for what I do. I’ve spent days, (ACTUAL DAYS!), watching raunchy videos and playing with my many toys. The entire time, I swear, I am completely unable to stop. And more often than not, it usually continues this way until my hands, arms or the delicate flesh of my pussy has become weak and achey, and I just can’t continue on any longer.

I mean, can you imagine being controlled exclusively by your own body. I’ve shed physical tears of frustration before many times. And this, after already orgasming at least a half dozen times. Oh! I am definitely not looking for anything as intense as that today. I think I’ll just settle for a little moaning and a lot of sexy shots. You know. Something a little more on the innocent side of things. So… what am I gonna type in the search box today?

“MILF”, “FORCED”, “SQUIRT”, “GANGBANG”, and “PUBLIC”. Oh, yes. This should be interesting.