Nights, and Knights of Pussies

So much crazy shit has happened recently. Nothing new for my life, it seems. The biggest, I guess, would notably be the exit of two of my closest friends. Both of them took me by great surprise Like to hear about it? Here it go.

I’ve known Joe for almost a year now. He was one of the very first friends that I made from the website I use most frequently. Although, I actually assumed, for the longest, that he was from a BP ad I had placed. 

He was nice looking and friendly and a total freakster. He certainly kept me on my toes… And never left me with a dry sheet.

I enjoyed his company so much, but it was certainly a workout every time. Every experience with him was the naughtiest, the kinkiest, the freakiest… definitely great times. But sometimes, a little difficult to keep up.

The past year, I’ve been so busy that I haven’t seen him that often. He’s more of a last-minute kind of guy, and I usually book a day or two in advance these days. It is obvious now that he’s held that against me, but he was careful to keep it in check the day that he visited me last.

It was right after I’d moved into my new home. He brought me several different items as housewarming gifts. I was overwhelmed with appreciation and love. He buried me in a warm embrace and then we went and FREAKED-OUT… Like usual.

He used his hand to force several violent orgasms from my body, covering my living room completely in my own juices. He used me in that way that I loved, yet feared to admit. EXTREMELY GRAPHIC CONTENT, to be sure.

Layin in the cold, wet sheets, he began a story (that I assumed was factual). He told me that things were very rough for him. His sex addiction had grown out of control and was bordering on costing him his marriage AND possible job complications. He immediately turned as I noticed a tear forming in his eye.

As if admitting his dilemma to me wasn’t difficult enough, when he went to handle my donation, he came up very, very short. There was only about $40 and some crumpled one’s in his pocket. I recalled my surprise, looking at them all wadded up in his hand. I snatched $30 quickly, and told him it was alright. I just wanted him to be okay.

My heart bled for him. I also suffer from a sex addiction, and I know how quickly it can grow into something that affects every part of the “normal” side of your life. When he left, I made him promise me, several times that he would keep in contact and lemme know what was going on. I was concerned and just wanted him to be okay.

Imagine my surprise when he dropped a review on one of the more expensive escorts here in the Panhandle. Even more shocking was the follow-up review just a few days later of a different escort off of BP. He even titled the review, “Another great time with…”

I was blown away. I felt humiliated and foolish. He had totally taking advantage of me. His heartfelt story had won over my sympathy and compassion and, obviously, my pocketbook as well. 

I couldn’t imagine any other escort accepting that type of stunt, had he pulled it on them, without causing a major scene. It was obvious now that I had just played myself. I PLAYED MYSELF.

I text him for days, but he didn’t respond. Finally, on my birthday, he text me back. Would you believe, he claims to have given me 60 or 80 dollars. Neither of them being my actual donation rate. Shit! He wasn’t even sure which of those two numbers, in fact, that I took home that day.

I attempted to translate my embarrassment to him in my typed text. He responded by calling me “GREEDY”. ON MY FUCKIN BIRTHDAY, THIS ASSHOLE JUST CLAIMED THAT I WAS GREEDY!

Now, completely swallowed by guilt, my emotions begin to overrun my thought process. I began to think of the one present that I had received for my birthday… my beautiful dildo. That is where my thinking ended. That was the only thing I received from my ALL of my friends. ONE BEAUTIFUL OPAQUE PHALLUS.

But I had a date with a very close friend the following day. I just knew he was going to bring me something. He claimed at every turn to care about me and respect and appreciate my friendship. The day after my birthday he showed up empty-handed. He didn’t even have a card.

Now, it’s foolish of me to give a fuck, right? But I don’t have a lot of other friends. Y’all are my friends. How you treat me DOES matter. It DOES affect how I feel. 

As soon as I realized he had nothing for me, I went off. Oh, I was TOTALLY wrong for my attitude.  He left immediately, then text me from his car, where I immediately apologized. 

I was still upset, but I understood I hurt his feelings. However, there’s something I haven’t yet told you about the situation.

The last time he had seen me, he was also empty-handed. He was waiting on his income tax check to arrive. He originally asked me to allow him to cum for free that time, and he would double up the donation on our next visit and give me $300.

This was the next time. But, he made it quite clear if I didn’t agree that we were fixing to get down and naughty, he wasn’t cummim back in with the money he’d promised me. I certainly didn’t like the position he’d just created for me, so I chose nothing. And he drove away. With my donation in his pocket.

So, I have to say, it wasn’t the best birthday ever. It should have been something special… but, whatever. At least my daughter got me something for my birthday. That means more to me than anything anyway.

You’re not supposed to lose friends on your birthday. It’s not right. But I’ve begun to realize that just calling ya’ll my friends, is not a guarantee that ya’ll will treat me like a true friend. 

So, this fella messaged me for months. His initial message described himself as MY BIGGEST FAN. Oh, this one hurts, people.

MBF has never been with an escort before. He found me through this blog. On “Playing with My Friends”, he truly was my biggest supporter. And because this blog is so personal for me, I felt we had somehow connected.

Now, I’ve met a couple men from here before. Gents who found my words to be insightful and passionate, long before they found ME through my words. Both turned out to be wonderful, one-night stands.

We tried to hook up several times, but his short time frames, and the great distance between us, always interfered. Finally, He had a two hour timeframe… AND a two hour drive. I truly wanted to make this happen.

He was late. (Doesn’t that ALWAYS happen when it’s something you truly can’t wait to do, see, or experience?) Very attractive, friendly, and masculine. I wasn’t disappointed.

He was passionate and gentle. We had the greatest time. Unfortunately, that great time ran into the driving time back to his home.

He attempted to send me a gift card right there on the way to the door. I watched him fumble with his phone in a panic, shoved off my musings on why he hadn’t already handled the transaction in advance, and couldn’t help but lend a hand. “Do it when you get back, darlin. You gotta go. I understand.”

I understand even more so now. I understand that he probably never intended on sending me our agreed upon donation. I’m really not sure. Understand that he never did send the gift card at all. Fucked again.

These little heartbreaks are killin me. I’m dyin inside. I know, everyone cares, but no one really does. No one ever sticks up for me. EVER. I don’t deserve that? People who don’t know me, hate me. What the fuck? How did I manage that?

Just know, I’m seeking a career change. I have always made excuses for my friends’ behavior, but now, I’m truly bruised and in pain.

And thanks, jerk, for not visiting me on my birthday. We’d scheduled it the day before, but then pushed playtime forward to the day of, because you were tired from work. I understood. I FULLY understand now, by your silence, that you KNOW how THAT made me feel.

But, whatever. Hey…

Who needs a WHITE KNIGHT…

When You Already Have a Pussy??


7 Replies to “Nights, and Knights of Pussies”

  1. Men like that just thrive on compassion and make use of it. Just always remember the problem is very much with them and on them….definitely not on you. You don’t deserve that at all, but keep your head up and your true friends will shine through…be true to yourself. Think about these guys on their birthdays…you think they are getting what they want? No…because they are cheating and lying to get what they want…which isn’t true to self. Happy belated Birthday xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. My girl you just have to quit being so sweet and compassionate..
    it’s your livelihood..
    treat it like business. Always..
    stop letting your guard down.
    And stop being so friendly…

    They won’t get better than you..
    so don’t worry.. you will always be in demand..

    So sorry 😐 these louse of a man.. treat you like that..
    Just don’t fall for it again..

    Their loss.. because they can’t come back.. and you know they will want you again

    Liked by 3 people

  3. That crap is infurating. if your poor, dont go chasing the best of things in life. if you make a deal, keep it. gah! well, here’s hoping you land something good if you do switch callings. And you keep writing of course. πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Just one word to describe these “men:” Losers. I had no idea this kind of stuff happened to you. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. After all, we guys on P4P sites can’t claim to be the sincerest or most honest guys around. You didn’t deserve this.

    Liked by 1 person

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